Should men and women have lists of what they are looking for?
Yes. And the second column should be a list of everything you’re bringing to the table. There has to be balance. You can say you want a clean cut athletic guy when you’re addicted to smoking and subscribe to a cheesecake of the month home delivery service. It’s true that opposites attract. But that’s for minor things like “He loves to cook, she loves to clean”. That’s a good thing. “He’s fanatical about his stamp collection, she’s deathly allergic to glue”. That’s going to be trouble.